I'm sorry, dear patient friends list, but I'm probably going to whine about this decision on and off until the end of the month when I will, theoretically at least, have made it!
OK, there seems to be some feeling that my last entry was a cliffhanger. For the record, I pressed "Update" on the entry, then instantly switched windows and pressed "Send" on the email. It did take an effort.
Would everyone stop telling me I'm brave, it's making me even more scared because it's making me feel like I *should* be scared!